they only want you when your seventeen

old school

2006-08-13T09:20:24Z

If you see this, comment.
I will send you something pretty.

br0ken_face @ 2005-03-01T19:15:00

2005-03-02T00:15:26Z

it's true: i even sleep when walking

a nothing update

2005-02-25T21:25:16Z

remember this: 7 months later, just when you think you've finally forgotten about someone, they will literally walk right into you at Starbucks. On a weekday at 11am, while you are wearing your school gym pants, and probably look really disgusting.

I am truly convinced there is some type of higher power Jesus, Satan, a flying angel, whatever, just because the things that happen to me are far too ironic and odd for there not to be.

don't wear it on my sleeve

2005-01-29T20:32:06Z

somedays you wake up and everything just changes. it's like the plates in your mind magically shift and you just realize you can't go on living the way you've been living. and it doesn't make sense because esentially, nothing really has changed. the situation is the same, and everything on the surface looks the same as it did the day before. but maybe you've changed, and you just don't realize it until later. in psychology, i think they call this a break-through. you see things clearly for the first time in months, sometimes years. you realize your just living in a metaphorical black hole, and theres noone to get you out but yourself. and living in a black hole isn't as bad as it sounds. you just ignore the problem, make like it's no big deal.
my life is good, sometimes border-line perfect i would say. but thats partially due to the fact that i live in denial. ignoring the problem has been easy but confronting the fact that there is a problem will royally fuck up nearly everything in my life right now, and it couldnt come at a worse time. i guess i'm just selfish.

i don't know, i just had to write this down somewhere.

Holden Caufield

2005-01-23T02:20:32Z

br0ken_face @ 2005-01-06T18:28:00

2005-01-06T23:56:00Z

2005, arithmetic style:

- a few inches of hair
+ disgusting week-long coldsore
+ bad relationship
- one "best" friend
+ school is horrid
- my college applications, except 2
+ toot making me sick
=
a shitty start to the year

br0ken_face @ 2004-12-30T01:33:00

2004-12-30T06:36:27Z

today i went to the Met. I like it there. If I had an apartment on 5th Avenue, I could build a new nest for the Pale Male. That would be nice.
I just ate an enormous chicken leg. It was practically tasteless though. I'm back to eating like one large meal a day because I have literally no appetite. I guess that's karma. Maybe I should just learn my lesson. The only times I do eat are when I'm out with other people who want to eat, luckily that seems to be every day.
This psychic in the village read my cards. That really nice one on Christopher Street with all the tapestries and awesome-looking stairs. Yea, I don't reccomend it.
It was bullshit. She had my life all wrong. And if what she said about my futrue was true, I might as well put myself out of my misery now.
The winter depresses me. Different parts of my body seem to have different air temperature zones and thats a pain in the ass. Getting dressed has become a major task.
I'm not looking forward to new year's. The future freaks me out. I think thats why I always cry on my birthday. Even when their good, Birthday's are always depressing.

1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
yayo. got my license. looked at colleges. road triped.

a few new things. actually.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
i don't think i made any resolutions this year.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
not that i know of.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
yes

5. What countries did you visit?
England, Scotland, Bahamas, Dominican Republic

6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
closure

7. What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Alkaline Trio on prom night. & the entire summer. my birthday this year was good too

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
f.i.t.

ending bad habits

9. What was your biggest failure?
disappointing people, drugs etc.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
mono. burns and cuts from a car crash

11. What was the best thing you bought?
panera's

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
no idea.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
bush/cheney.

certain friends

14. Where did most of your money go?
clothes, food.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
the summer, alkaline trio

16. What song will always remind you of 2004?
saves the day(b sides)

taking back sunday

vanessa carlton- white houses

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?: it really makes me feel good to say happier.
b) thinner or fatter?: same
c) richer or poorer?: poorer

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
studying.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
procrastinating, eating paneras

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
crying in my room, with my family

20. How will you be spending New Years?
not sure. probably passed out somewhere

22. Did you fall in love in 2004?
i guess not

23. How many one-night stands?
none.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
sex and the city.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
im too lazy to actually hate anyone

26. What was the best book you read?
linvisible monsters by chuck palahniuk. i loved that book.

& breakfast of champions by kurt vonnegut

&the alchemist

i liked the great gatsby too

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Interpol, the shins, Rufus Wainwright

28. What did you want and get?
a lot that i probably take for granted

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind, Malibu's Most wanted, Closer

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
on my actual birthday, i had a benihana party

32. What one thing that would have made your year?
having a relationship that actually meant something

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
whatever i want to wear, i dont know

34. What kept you sane?
music, friends, late nights.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
jude law

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
gahh. too many

37. Who did you miss?
ryan

38. Who was the best new person you met?
dont know

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004.
there are so few genuine people & even when you think you know someone, chances are you don't.

You can't rely on other people to make you happy. True happiness is something you find within yourself & you have to risk being completely cut open and exposed.

chris riggs

2004-12-28T03:36:52Z

i think this is my new favorite song of the moment. love it. makes me want to cry and dance at the same time.
Christmas sucked, I refuse to sugar-coat it anymore. And I'm not referring to the presents because I actually got a lot of amazing things I really don't deserve. Christmas just somehow seems to get worse every year.
Besides that, my break has basically consisted of me returning to my lazy nature and doing almost as little as possible.
Today I met my crazy Aunt, who gave me a tour of her Redidence. The apartments were actually really nice and there's a kitchen and a gym. It's in Gramercy Park , right next door to the SVA dorms. I should apply to SVA just because I'd be saving a lot on transportation. It was really nice of her and it's nice to know I'll have somewhere to live come graduation. I think my last day of classes is May 13, hopefully I won't have any exams and I can peace out New Jersey by the 14th. Wow, that's like 5 months. insane.
I'm going to really miss my dog & the Reo too.
I wanted to accomplish all this stuff over break, but I've basically been sitting around watching sex & the city dvd's.
Yesterday I went to bed at 1am and slept until 4 pm, no joke. That's 13 hours of sleep. Then I sat around for a few more hours then Matt & I went to Benihana and came back to my house to watch Napoleon Dynamite(completely over-rated by the way, except for the chapstick scene).
And that's an example of everyday this past week.
I thought I had like, more that 2 friends, but everyone seems really busy this break of on vacation. assholes.

ow my stomach hurts

childhood

2004-12-22T02:12:19Z

br0ken_face @ 2004-12-07T06:44:00

2004-12-07T11:57:42Z

something that pisses me off:

those Yellow Ribbons that 99% of cars now have on their bumper. Am I the only person who realizes that there's a strong possibility that the troops in Iraq might be a little too busy or too far away to check out this magnet?
I don't hate America, I just doubt the fact that slapping a stupid magnet, mass-produced at a sweatshop in China, has meaning. Everyone supports the troops and hopes they will return safely. Maybe you all should try telling them directly, instead of just driving around with a big magnetic banner your probably got at K-mart.
Another thing that pisses me off is these Livestrong bracelets. It's awesome that so much money is going to Cancer research, but now people are selling fake bracelets, making money off a disease that kills millions. And most of the people that buy these bracelets buy them because it's some sort of new trend.
I find it really depressing that most people will only donate to a cause when others are watching, when they can get something in return for themselves. Nobody donates money when noone's there to see them do so.

T

br0ken_face @ 2004-11-22T17:27:00

2004-11-22T22:38:21Z

update for the masses:

-i have mono. this means i sleep for 10 hours and then wake up ready for a nap.

-school sucks more than ever this year. i have 3 papers due tomorrow and my English teacher is ruining my social life.

-i did suprisingly well on my SAT's and decided yesterday to apply to only 3 schools, instead of the 12. it would suck if they all rejected me.

-I hate the winter and I'll be seperated from my family this Thanksgiving.

-Saturday night Matt took me to a Drag Queen show in New Brunswick. This was more fun that it sounds. I like him because he's hot(i'm shallow, i know)and he makes me laugh. but at the same time he's dumb and doesn't know how to hold my hand right.

okay, now the update button.

stomp

2004-10-28T13:40:12Z

my secret dream is to pack my suitcase, drive to the airport in the middle of the night, and get on a plane to Europe or California or anywhere that's not here...

on Monday I actually made it to the airport, paid for that parking pass thing and everything. But there's always something that makes me change my mind at the last minute and I hate that.

not updating

2004-08-31T17:54:40Z

hold my hand through thick and thinner

I love Ryan

2004-08-13T04:16:50Z

"We live in a town where out Mayor and Priest both turn out to be gay. Oh, and they commit adultery."- Ryan

I LOVE WOODBRIDGE. Come back, McGreevy

this summers ok but..

2004-08-11T04:22:06Z

i want summer love.

i am oficially jealous of all couples in love. you people are assholes.

br0ken_face @ 2004-08-07T00:14:00

2004-08-07T04:19:19Z

yesterday I was in the Bahamas, today I'm in New Jersey. I haven't been in my house for more than 2 consecutive days since school got out. It feels weird. But its summer and it's slow. So I can't complain. Life is good, pretty good. I don't feel the need to write about it on Livejournal, though.

But can someone tell me why Rancid is not on Warped Tour? Rancid IS Warped Tour.

br0ken_face @ 2004-07-25T19:00:00

2004-07-25T23:17:34Z

husband<33

i have this problem where i'm always too lazy to charge my camera battery, so my camera usually dies 10 minutes into the night and i with 2 or 3 really blurry pictures. oh well.
this guy just asked me what i was doing, i said nothing, im bored. he says "what do you want me to do to entertain you?'' does that mean he wants to have phone sex? disgusting
guys confuse me, seriously. what the fuck is wrong with you people.
having this livejournal has resulted in the fact that i no longer want to write about my life, i just want to read about everyone elses.
sorry i'm not more of an attention whore.

'fuck you, you fuckin' fuck.'

2004-07-15T00:25:26Z

So I guess it's my 3rd day of New York living with the pops. It's been good, aside from it raining almost 24/7. Today I woke up late forgot my id, didn't realize it until I got to school, and didn't feel like running back to get it in time. Instead, I took the subway to Canal st. and went shopping in Soho. Which was good, except for getting harassed to join the Socialist party. Afterwards, I tried to sneak into the Rufus Wainwright/Ben Folds concert in central park. There was security and fencing all over so my plan of jumping through a shrub didn't quite pan out. I met this guy though who was telling me about free concerts on Wednesday nights, so it's alright.
Oh, does anyone watch fuse? Yesterday, I met some guy on fuse, I forget his name though. Not sure if he was a host or in a band but he was taping at 4:30 yesterday and wearing a hat. Someone tell me who this is. Afterwards, me and Leah were waiting outside Houlihan's for her mom and this woman comes out of the restairant naked, dancing in front of a huge group of people. true story. Nobody even tried to stop her. In fact, the only person who said anything was the dude selling the bootleg spiderman Dvd's. And all he kept saying was 'Oh no she didn't, oh no girl.' seriously, complete indecent exposure. we laughed for about 20 minutes, i think you just had to be there though. the nudity wasn't what really shocked me , it was the fact that this was in front of Houlihan's, the family restaurant. My parents used to take me there all the time when I was little. There were clowns, and ice-creams in bowls shaped like baseball caps. What is this world coming to?

i'm bored, someone im me(recycledair1)
p.s. my cell phone is messed up, so sorry to anyone who calls me.

peace d00dz!!!

independecia!

2004-07-05T05:01:03Z

Lighting firecrackers out on the front lawn, there'd be no distance that could hold us back.

i look like a drunk

2004-07-02T05:35:28Z

i don't update this so much, but i'm bored
today i hung out with my neighboor, ryan
everyone else is on vacation or busy. bastards
he stole his parents coin jars and we took them to that coinstar machine.
2 huge jars of coins came out to 33 dollars? that machine is rigged, for sure.
we took the money and saw spiderman.
aka the BEST superhero movie ever. yea, even better than batman.
go see it or i'll come to your house and drag you.
we used the rest of the money to buy peach snapple & cake
uhmm then i got the idea that it would be fun to play tennis.
so we did, at 11pm, it was fun until i tripped on these acorns.
tonights yankee game was also extremely intense.

i'm still bored and i really wish my computer had photoshop, and DSL too
i hope everyones having a good summer

spiderman's biggest fan,
a-s-h-l-e-y

br0ken_face @ 2004-06-21T11:16:00

2004-06-21T16:17:06Z

Fuck you all. fuck Woodbridge because it's a piece of shit town and I don't belong here. Fuck the people in Woodbridge because your all pedophiles and I want to stab you. Fuck the police because you get paid to sit around and do nothing you pathetic excuse for human beings. Fuck the people who read this because none of you give a shit anyways. Fuck the people who leave me annonymous comments because you motherfuckers don't know me. Fuck my car, oh wait, I have no car. Fuck Matt for going to Maine and leaving me here by myself. Fuck my parents for not giving a shit about me. Fuck most of my friends because they only hang out with me because it benefits them. Fuck New Brunswick, just because.Fuck being sick, because I always am. Fuck minimum wage, it's slave labor. Fuck school because I learned nothing this entire year. Fuck drugs because after a certain point your immune. Fuck you if you think just because your in a band I want to have sex with you. Your music is a joke, go and fucking swallow toothpicks, motherfucker.
Fuck my stupid meningless life because it seems perfect on the outside but in reality I hate it.
killyourselfdieihateyou,
Ashley

accident

2004-06-16T23:43:34Z

today i was on the news. it wasnt good though. i was driving on main st. by the bowling alley, towards short hills to get a bathing suit. i was in the middle of turning, turn signal and all, when this car comes speeding out of nowhere. my brother screams, i turn and see it hit, then the entire car FLIPS OVER. I couldn't really tell though all i could see was the air bags exploding, my arm fly up, and all this dust all over. the horn was going off and my whole door was jammed in. i finally opened it and fell out. i seriously thought i would be paralyzed or missing an eye or all bloody when i stepped out but i was pretty ok. my brother came from the other side and all he kept saying was he couldn't hear anything and his stomach hurt. that was the scariest part, thinking i made my brother deaf and all. then police and emts and firetrucks came. everyone keeps saying to just be happy we're alive, easy for them to say. your new car isn't completely ruined. i think i can officially say these past few months have been the worst of my entire life. now my summers basically over because my parents are making me get a job to pay my insurance.

br0ken_face @ 2004-06-08T19:01:00

2004-06-08T23:08:15Z

it cost $600 to fix a car headlight?
driving is overrated and stupid, and i've had my liscense less than a week and already have serious road rage.
i'm going back to my razor scooter.
on a happier note, tomorrow is the last day of school. finally. junior year= a bad school year
i wish my house was built on the beach.
these updates are always pointless
go see Happy Potter!!

br0ken_face @ 2004-06-06T10:07:00

2004-06-06T14:10:43Z

hello, i'm still alive

nepotism

2004-05-15T12:44:32Z

ATTN: If you are in the New York area this afternoon, come to the 9th avenue festival and buy one of my grandfathers paintings because their AMAZING. And if your really cool,you could buy one of mine. There the ones that are really messed up looking and significantly cheaper than every other painting. I desperately need money but i refuse to do any real work or work at any more stores. Hollister can shove it.
thassit buh-bye